Mindfully Intentional

It’s clean up time in the garden: raking leaves, pulling weeds, cutting back dead growth, and a myriad of other chores occupy most of my day. More random than methodical, I move from one thing to the other, often getting distracted from the task at hand to pull an isolated weed or place a piece of garden art in a different location. Somewhat inefficient, but it makes sense to me--it’s the way I do things; however, there is one thing that doesn’t make sense: losing, or misplacing items! Gloves, a tool, my compost bucket, fertilizer, water bucket, phone, glasses—nothing is exempt. I spend way too much time wandering around the garden, sometimes the garage and in the house, looking for things. A very annoying time-waster. Anyone feel me?

I’m not present in the moment, but often operate on auto-pilot, thinking of something else instead of the task at hand. I lay things down without paying attention. Whatever surface is near when I lay down the object becomes its resting place. If I’m trimming plants and get up to take the trimmings to the bucket, I may lay the clippers near the plant. Often, something near the bucket catches my eye, say a random weed. I pull it, then start arranging the surrounding area, then three cups of coffee demand to be released from my bladder, so I take off my gloves, go inside, check my phone. Going back out I look for my gloves and clippers, which are where I mindlessly laid them. Since I have no memory of where I laid them, so begins the time-wasting search. This is one scenario--you get the picture.

I’ve learned I need God’s help for pretty much everything. When I identify a problem, a bad habit, wrong thinking—especially anything that requires internal change—I confess it by saying a reverent “yeah, I do that”—and ask him to help me. Working together, change comes. Not perfectly, not completely, most always slowly, but with my human limitations and frailties, that’s the way it is. I’ll take whatever improvements we can achieve together while in this earthly realm, however small they are.

After thinking about this inefficient, annoying pattern, I decided there is one main reason: mindlessness. Once I realized I was doing this, I made a conscious decision to be more mindful. I find myself mindlessly laying my clippers down on a rock, but then I stop and think I won’t remember where that rock is. I put them somewhere that makes sense. I’m trying to be present in the moment instead of letting my mind wander to and fro with no rhyme or reason. Isn’t there an ancient admonishment to “take every thought captive”? Hmm, this could possibly be an opportunity to practice that, although I don’t think that’s what it really means. I don’t think God will mind if I stretch it.

My intention, my heart’s desire, is to pay attention and be “present” as I go about my day. As I’m being mindful about my work, I also want to be mindful of my thoughts. I often pray as I work. Having a conversation with God in the garden takes extra intentional effort and slowing down because it hasn’t become second nature to me yet. It’s easy to get distracted, hurry, or follow an interrupting thought. Forming a new habit takes repetition and time. I’m learning to be both mindful of the present task and God’s presence. He is patient and always there—I just have to be mindful and intentional, which I intend to do.