Church as an Oasis

Can you love God and not go to church? A sincere young man recently asked me this question. My mind turned to the Spirit of Truth for an answer. If I say “yes” then it might seem church isn’t important. If I say “no”, it reduces the love of God to rules and regulations. What should I say?

He said he didn’t like church. I remember not liking church when I was young; but here I am, plugged in--not so much because I enjoy it (because, honestly, sometimes I don’t), but because I’ve learned that “church” is important. The ritual of “going to church” has little appeal and no value to me without the communal experience of friendship with God and with one another. Friendship with God is interactive, and when we’re talking with each other…well, there’s nothing like it. God made us to live in community—encouraging one another, loving one another, bearing each other’s burdens. When it’s done right it’s a beautiful thing. But what if it isn’t?

In the early 80’s, by divine intervention, I attended a church where I actually experienced the true, deep, forgiving, sacrificial love of God. It was called A People of Prayer, and it was.  My life was a wreck, I was a wreck. Often, I did nothing but cry through the worship (I remember angelic singing) while my two little girls cried in the nursery because they were insecure and needy. It hurts my heart to think about it. It was a very difficult time and we were in great need of grace--lots of grace. We received it there—it was an oasis in the midst of my personal desert. No one judged our Goodwill clothes and unkempt looks. No one said I “should” or “shouldn’t” do this or that. We were loved and my children were taken care of so that I could experience healing worship. I was loved by people being the hands and feet of Jesus. Someone lent me their car, saying it was “God’s car”, and babysat the girls so I could go on a job interview. She barely knew me, how could she trust I wouldn’t wreck it? She trusted God and took his command to love one another seriously, even strangers like me.

Eventually, the church split and I moved. I attended a few churches over the next few years, but none came to close to that first church community experience. In fact, one church was the complete opposite.   They asked me to leave the church because they didn’t agree with a life choice I felt I had to make. My feeling was: Sure I’ll leave—gladly! This lack of grace contributed to my not going to church for six years. I loved God and believed in his Word, but decided to just do my own thing. (We could still be besties, right?). But without community—the encouragement and support of like-minded people—it’s hard to stay on track. My trajectory began to curve and pretty soon I was far away from God and lost connection. But God is faithful, even when we’re not.

I was a lost sheep, but he brought me home again. Once again, divine providence brought me to a church that felt like home. It was full of grace and love, balanced teaching, and wise counsel. It wasn’t without problems—no church is, because we, as humans, are far from perfect. Due to a tragic event and then mistakes made, it split. But I, and my young grandson who went with me, will never forget it. We are still strengthened by the foundation this solid church gave us, and I made lifetime friends that remain close.

These experiences, together with the current climate in the Church (in America at least) all swirl together in my mind. There are some churches where I might be asked to leave if I were honest. There are some that assume Christians should all think the same and vote the same, because, after all, it’s “God’s way of thinking”. There are some that are so focused on issues, they’ve forgotten Jesus came not to solve worldly problems (there were plenty in his day), but to love and save people—all people. And he does the changing through an inner transformational process, not a legalistic stance.

I only have a few moments to think about how I will answer his question: Can you love God and not go to church?  I understand. I do. The last thing I want is for him to go, and then come away with a broken heart and distaste for God’s people. And so I say: The most important thing to God is relationship. He wants to be your best friend because he loves you. It’s not about going to church, it’s about loving and knowing him; but it’s easy to move away from God without other people who know him who will encourage and support you. God made us to love one another, work together and help each other.

I pray those words were spoken by the Spirit of Truth and reach his heart.  I pray he one day finds his oasis where God’s love is demonstrated through acceptance, forgiveness, mercy, and acts of kindness. I pray that we, as people who love God with all our heart, mind, and soul, join together in unity to become an oasis in the world God so loved—corporately in the place we call “church”, and individually in our daily lives. There are people living in a desert all around us who need a drink of water, and we should be handing them out.

Now I think I will sit in God’s garden awhile and ponder the idea of church as an oasis. This beautiful song is a prayer for restoration and unity: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fylsIaNsJ5o